Forest Notes for July

Bunchberry flowers

Hard to believe we’re well past midsummer and have only one full month of summer left. While the beginning of fall isn’t until late September, August has the feel of summer already winding down. With July you still have the ambiance of summertime without feeling you have fall and winter breathing down your neck. The above flower is bunchberry which blooms in spring but in midsummer produces bright red berries.

bunchberry fruit

It’s actually a member of the dogwood family, blooming perennially and spreading itself on the forest floor. The berries are said to be edible but many people find them tasteless. I have never tried them and prefer to leave them for the birds and other critters in the forest.

Another flower which appears in July doesn’t even look quite like a flower. In fact it is often mistaken for some sort of fungus. This is easy to understand as unlike other plants it has no chlorophyll and is pale white.

ghost flowers

Called ghost pipes or Indian pipes this little plant is classed with the heathers and other heath plants though you would never guess it to look at them. It is a parasitic plant, feeding off of mycorrhizal fungus which in turn live symbiotically with trees, usually beech trees. This unusual characteristic limits its habitat and makes it nearly impossible to grow in your garden unless you have exactly the right conditions.

As for fungi themselves, I didn’t see much of them in the earlier part of the summer when we were under semi-drought conditions. But over the past three weeks, we have been receiving an abundance of rain which has stimulated them to send up fruiting bodies. They come in an amazing assortment of sizes and colors, some edible, some definitely not.

morel mushroom

mushroom with yellow cap

mushroom with orange cap

Fungi were originally included in the category of plants but once DNA sequencing hit its stride, it was discovered that they are actually in a class of their own and are more closely related to animal forms than they are to plants. In fact the biological tree of life we used to see in our old biology textbooks has gotten very complex and gnarly thanks to recent discoveries using DNA sequencing.

tree of life

This diagram has been redrawn many times by scientists and will likely be tweaked repeatedly for some time to come. It bears remembering that the above drawing exists mostly for our own convenience in trying to make sense of the intricate biosphere we are part of. Organisms are under no obligation to fit neatly into this diagram. In fact there are a few that seem to delight in bamboozling us as to how to categorize them. One good example is the slime mold.

There are hundreds of ‘species’ of this bizarre life form. It lives most of its life or lives as single celled organisms. Then under the right environmental conditions, all the cells move together, congeal and form a single ‘body’ we refer to as a slime mold. Some molds form a single gigantic ‘cell’ with multiple nuclei while others maintain their single cell arrangement but unite with others and move as though they were a single organism. They seem to occupy the borderline between single cell bacteria and multi-celled critters like ourselves, cheerfully switching back and forth over the border depending on environmental circumstances. Scientists eagerly study these strange organisms hoping to gain insights into how multi-celled life may have got its start.

Slime molds are mostly harmless to humans and serve an important role in breaking down dead matter and recycling it. I actually came across one type of slime mold a few weeks ago.

dogvomit slime mold

This is known by the rather charming name of dog-vomit slime mold and it did look rather like something a dog might have up-chucked. As slime molds ooze about very slowly, I went back later in the day hoping to check on how far it had shifted, only to discover to my dismay, it had vanished. Had it slithered under the pine needles? Or finished its life cycle? Hard to say. But slime molds move according to their own rhythms, not ours.

It’s weird to watch time-lapse videos showing how slime molds get around. For all their seeming simplicity, they are remarkable complex life-forms which still hold many mysteries for curious humans to explore. Not for the first time it makes me wonder if we will ever recognize alien life-forms if we can barely even make sense of the creatures here on earth that are related to us yet utterly different in their approach to life. It’s easy to forget how provincial we are until we find ourselves face to face (?) with a slime mold.

Hmmm. So was that really a slime mold? Or an extraterrestrial exploring our strange planet? Inquiring minds want to know.

flying saucer

See you next month.

Forest Notes For June

The month of June has certainly whizzed by fast. It seems as if I just barely got the gardens planted and here it is less than two weeks away from the Fourth of July. I’m hoping the tiger lilies will make a showing this year. I have been diligently drowning Scarlet Lily beetles in soapy water (eschewing chemical pesticides) and so far have kept any beetles grubs from devouring the leaves and buds. In spite of the near drought conditions this past spring, enough rain has fallen so many plants are doing well.

The local Water and Light Department went around this past winter cutting back tree branches and shrubbery from the overhead wires. They trimmed back some of the branches on the two Washington Hawthorn trees on the front lawn, which must have been a major undertaking as the trees are gifted with two inch long needle sharp thorns which they aren’t afraid to use. But the trimming didn’t phase the hawthorns as they leafed out well this spring and are now in full blossom. One thing I didn’t discover until the lower branches began producing flowers as well as the upper is that this particular variety of hawthorn has flowers that – well – smell like something died. This hasn’t stopped bees from visiting it as well as the expected flies, wasps and other odd-looking insects. Makes me wonder what the honey might taste like.

Hawthorn tree flowers

Another much less welcome plant has shown up again as well. That would be poison ivy (the plant, not the DC villainess)

Poison Ivy leaves

The photo above shows the leaves at dead center. Most people know the adage; ‘Leaflets three, let it be’. But there’s another rhyme associated with the plant which is less well known. ‘Berries white, take flight!’ The plant has non-descript tiny flowers which produce whitish berries. These are toxic to humans but not to birds who devour them without any hesitation. The seeds in the berry survive the trip through their digestive tracts and get excreted with a nice little packet of bird guano to give them a good start. So if you are wondering how those darn poison ivy vines started growing where none had been before, that’s how. I use long handled clippers for trimming them back as far as I can without risk to myself, not being brave and bold enough to try pulling them up by (gloved) hand.

Within the past few decades, another vine has made its appearance here in northern New Hampshire. Virginia Creeper now grows rampantly along local roadsides often overwhelming other plants. It has occasionally been mistaken for poison-ivy but only by people who can’t count. Poison-ivy has just three leaves, while Virginia Creeper has five.

Virginia Creeper vines

While it is native to North America, it is sometimes classed as an invasive due to its exuberant growth. Because of its handsome dark red color in the fall, people have sometimes planted it as an ornamental only to rue it afterwards.

Virginia Creeper in fall

Given how fast it has spread around the area here over the past few years, it would probably qualify as America’s answer to Kudzu. However while Kudzu is actually edible, Virginia Creeper and its dusty blue berries are to be avoided due to their oxalic acid content which can cause digestive upset and even kidney problems. As with poison-ivy berries, birds are not bothered by this substance and can eat them without worrying about intestinal blowback. Many songbirds relish them and turkeys will eat them as well. With the recent boom in the population of turkeys introduced to this state starting back in the Seventies, their favorites foods have spread along with the birds themselves; Virginia Creeper, grapes, and (gulp) yes, poison ivy.

Although I live in a residential neighborhood in town, a surprising number of animals still share the area with the humans who have overrun it. Bears will trash feeders if available, woodchucks and raccoons will cheerfully raid unprotected gardens and what they don’t get, the deer will polish off. Chipmunks and grey squirrels are ubiquitous along with the occasional red fox. Once several years ago I spotted a bobcat trotting across my lawn early in the morning in a very business-like fashion. Not sure if he was a vagabond or if he actually lived in town. It wouldn’t surprise me if he did as there is enough prey around to support a townie lifestyle. Most of these critters stay carefully out of sight so it’s easy to be startled by how many there actually are. The Covid lockdown last year emptied the streets of humans and as a result a surprising number of critters popped out of the woodwork much to the astonishment of many people.

Each summer presents its own challenges as well as pleasant experiences. It will be interesting to see what July brings to the table. Happy Summer!

White tailed deer

Transitions of the seasons

The first day of autumn landed on this past Tuesday at 9:30 AM just a few days after my 66th birthday. Usually the seasons seem to pass quite uneventfully from one to the next with only minor irritating glitches, soon forgotten. This past year though has definitely been a doozy.

It began of course with the advent of COVID-19. The reaction in the press was comparable to a nuke being dropped. The television news services tend to go over the top anyway, especially in recent years, but this has really been unprecedented. With so much information and mis-information flying around, it’s been hard to make sense of it all. But peering past all the hype and hysteria, it is possible to glean a few useful insights. COVID has a fairly low mortality rate overall but by the same token, it’s not something to take lightly. As a sixty-plus year old individual I am definitely taking precautions though I refuse to get into a lather about it. But how does the current epidemic stack up overall with pandemics of earlier years?

Looking back into the past, smallpox mortality rate was 30%, diphtheria 10% (though in young children it could be as much as 20%). Ebola runs very roughly about 50% and bubonic plague much the same. COVID seems to be just below 5% though statistics are still a little conflicting. Seasonal flu usually runs about .1%. What to do? Well, basically what they have been recommending: wear face masks in public areas, practice social distancing, do a lot of hand washing and recognize that epidemics, even the worst ones, will eventually run their course.

Then there were the ‘murder hornets’ arriving on our shores. These ghastly creatures are nearly two inches long with a stinger they can use over and over, unlike a honeybee which can only sting once. One victim likened it to being slugged in the jaw by Mike Tyson. It’s a pretty brutal critter. Given previous attempts to rid ourselves of invasive insects such as gypsy moths, Asian tiger mosquitoes, emerald ash borers, marmolated stink bugs, Formosan termites, fire ants and African bees, thing don’t look too promising. One can only hope that because of its size this in-your-face invader will be a little easier to track down and at least keep under control.

Then there’s the drought. While we’ve been able to avoid wildfires of the sort they’ve been having out west, still we are at risk. This past summer in New Hampshire has been the driest in several years. While southern New Hampshire has been the worst hit, here in the northern part of the state, it has been well over a month since any measurable rain has fallen.

A number of towns, including where I live, have begun ordering restricted water usage meaning no car washing, no lawn or garden watering, etc. Since it’s the end of the growing season here that’s not a big deal. The weather report promises a chance of rain next week but it likely will not put much of a dent in the deficit. If anybody knows how to do a rain dance, please step up to the plate and help out!

Now that a few frosts have hit, leaves are beginning to change color. It’s hard to say if the drought will affect the quality of the color. It’s still a bit spotty right now but will likely increase and peak in just a few short weeks. Then we will know better.

Autumn is usually a pretty decent time of year. The weather is not so torrid as during the summer. Mosquitoes have been squashed by the fall chill. If I time my morning walk right, I am likely to see some flocks of geese going overhead on their way south. While trick-or-treating will likely be canceled due to the COVID epidemic, ghoulish lawn decorations will no doubt go up to mark the arrival of Halloween.

But we’re not quite out of the woods yet. Unfortunately there will still be one final catastrophe to face before Thanksgiving. Yes, I mean the national election. Obviously the less said about that the better.

Noooo!!!! Please, not more pollsters!!!!!

Take care all.

Comfort Food

watching evening news will turn you into a blobfish

I very rarely watch the news these days as it’s too depressing. Old issues thought resolved have resurfaced demanding resolution. New issues are being created out of whole cloth at times apparently just for the sake of having something to scream about. This will all run its course as human events do. One of the reactions to the turmoil of current events is to turn to comfort food. Wikepedia defines comfort food as “food that provides a nostalgic or sentimental value … and may be characterized by its high caloric nature, high carbohydrate level, or simple preparation.”

What comfort food you favor often depends on where you lived and what you ate growing up. Pizza seems to loom large in many minds. Also burgers, mac and cheese, ice cream, chocolate and hot dogs are frequent choices among Americans. Around the world, comfort food takes the form of such dishes as rice puddings, herbed flatbread, moussaka and pierogies.

It seems to be something deeply embedded in us that prompts us to seek out food of this nature during times of stress. A scientist was being interviewed in a documentary by Nova about the violent eruption of Mount Pinatubo while he was at Clark’s Air Base. He described the harrowing situation as the volcano grew more and more violent. Noticing one of his fellow scientists had made up a batch of popcorn and was avidly devouring it, he expressed astonishment asking him why he was eating popcorn. “I always eat popcorn at this part of the movie.” was the response.

Popcorn is definitely one of the go-to foods when things seem to be getting out of hand whether it’s the result of an irritated volcano or rioting humans. My own personal favorite is of course ice cream. Fudge ripple, plain and simple, frequently shows up in my freezer in spite of its negative affect on my waistline. Popcorn sits up in the cupboard waiting for an appropriate moment to pull out the kettle, add ghee, pop it up and slather the results with butter and salt.

During the winter, the old stock pot will often come out and whatever chicken, turkey or beef bones I saved up in the freezer get hauled out and turned into broth.

stock pot

Along with veggies I also add pasta, particularly when it’s poultry. The shapes vary according to my mood; spirals, bowties or alphabet. While not essential for good soup, they add a little extra something transforming it into excellent winter comfort food. Add a few saltine crackers and absolute perfection is achieved.

Pasta itself often serves as comfort food. Once in a while I will purchase large egg noodles, boil them up, add butter and salt and sit back with a large bowl. They get cooked the same way my late mother used to cook pasta, which is to say twice as long as the box calls for. I grew up eating pasta like this, thinking nothing of it and so got a bit of a shock the first time I ate it ‘al dente’. (Gah! They didn’t cook this enough!!)

spaghetti goulash

An old family favorite is spaghetti goulash. According to my mother, when she originally began making this as a quick dish when my two older brothers were very small she used a canned tomato sauce for the base (either Franco-American or Chef Boyardee, I forget which). It went over well but she ran into a curious problem. Often, though not every time, one of my brothers would get sick to his stomach afterwards. Never both together and sometimes not at all. After this happened more than a few times she began to suspect the tomato sauce was to blame. So she switched to Campbell’s Tomato condensed soup with a few tablespoons of ketchup added. The issue vanished, so apparently the commercial sauce was a bit too spicy for my brothers delicate stomachs.

The recipe is as basic as it gets. Spaghetti gets boiled up (yes, twice the time the package of Prince spaghetti calls for), then three quarters pound of ground chuck gets fried up. I don’t add any butter or oil. The pan is heated medium high and the ground chuck gets stirred constantly until fully cooked. Then the tomato sauce with ketchup gets mixed in. Finally last but not least the cooked spaghetti is added. Nothing else gets put in and that includes any spices, much to the horror of an Italian girlfriend one of my brothers brought one time to dinner. ( No basil?? Gasp! No oregano??? Arghh!!). She disappeared after a while. Oh well.

The household I grew up in was largely spice and onion free as my father was adamantly opposed to them. There was absolutely no doubt in his mind that the source of America’s eternal struggle with dyspepsia was those infernal spices. Onions were his bete noire (or so he claimed). So he refused to tolerate them. My mother would sneak in some onion when she made up beef stew, maybe a pinch of thyme in the turkey soup but that was about it. Nowadays, I am an avid onion user and generously toss in thyme and parsley into my chicken soup.

So whatever your favorite source of culinary comfort is, whip up a batch and sit back while eating. It will make the maddening crowd seem far away.

partridge berry

The Toilet Paper Crisis

Unless you’ve been marooned for the past three or four months on a deserted island, you’re no doubt quite aware of the COVID-19 pandemic. Here in New Hampshire, the state governor has issued a stay-at-home order where all non-essential businesses such as retail stores, movie theaters, hair salons and tattoo parlors (c’mon, folks. You can live without a new tat.) The order will be in effect until May 4th, when presumably this thing will have peaked and started to subside.

Many places have already voluntarily shut down. For the first time I have no problem finding a parking space on Main Street. Of course there’s no place to shop for non-essential goodies. While on-line shopping is still possible, I did get an email yesterday from Herrschners, an online store I occasionally buy cross-stitch material and jigsaw puzzles from, indicating new orders would not be shipped out until further notice. The state of Wisconsin, where they are located has issued a directive. Apparently someone thinks coronavirus can be shipped through the mail. (Sigh…) At least I’m all stocked up with projects.

The local churches have suspended services until further notice.

Closed sign at Catholic church

Someone thoughtfully put a little votive candle in a glass jar with a sign saying ‘Pray for USA.’

Pray for USA sign at church

Now the title of this post is ‘The Toilet Paper Crisis’ for good reason. Does anyone know where the stuff went? I know people were panic buying, purchasing mass quantities of the stuff (because it’s all about your needs, right? To hell with everybody else.) I stocked up before hand after reading warnings about possible panic buying and I’m glad I did. But I suspect I will probably run out by mid-April. As long as a new supply comes into the stores, that’s okay but so far I don’t see any sign of that. Have the paper mills all shut down? Did all our toilet paper come from overseas? Apparently no one has a clue what’s really going on.

So until this mess starts to get straightened out, what do we do in the meantime? What do we use instead of toilet paper? Well, there are a variety of options, not all of them for the germaphobic.

One solution is a bidet which looks a little like a cross between a toilet and a sink. You use it to wash your private parts after you use the toilet, though you will still need to dry yourself. Some bidets come with air dryers but that can run into some money. There are low tech choices, often used in third world nations, such as the tabo and the iota. If you are the frugal type, there are inexpensive mini-bidets for use when traveling which will accomplish the same purpose for less money. Adventurous types might want to try re-purposing items already in the home.

Reusable fabric wipes are available for drying yourself once you’ve used any of the above. They just need to be laundered afterwards. Those who are old enough to recall reusable diapers no doubt remember the routine. While baby wipes are still available, it is strongly advised to leave those for mothers who need them. Also do not flush wipes down the toilet as they will clog up sewage pipes.

Newsprint will work in a pinch as well as sponges as long as you use the sponges for only this purpose and clean them afterwards. Plant leaves can be used if nothing else is available. Just don’t pick something you might be allergic to!

This crisis will pass as all emergencies do but life being what it is, more may loom on the horizon down the road. Learning alternatives to business as usual will leave us better prepared for the next one.

Take care, all.

Photo of turtle approaching toilet paper alternative

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A special note. I have sold another short story to the magazine Into The Ruins, the spring 2020 issue.

Thank you very much, Mr Caris!